Throughout most of my life, I have been childlike most often. I can be as sophisticated as anyone else if there is some reason to be, but as I age, I see less and less reason. I used to feel as if there was some big secret others knew that they weren’t telling me. I laugh about that now, but I really did think that for many years. So many people acted superior to me that I genuinely thought there must be something wrong with me that I hadn’t discovered. I began digging within over thirty years ago, only to wind up enjoying the journey of self discovery so much, I ceased caring what others thought of me! Now I laugh more than anyone I know, for as I found out things about myself, I was finding out things about humanity in general.  There are times now that people call me wise.  Oh! My! I can’t cross the street without someone reminding me to look both ways. If I am wise, the world is in more trouble than I had thought! I’m content to be a little less foolish than in my past, and to make new mistakes instead of the same ones over and over again as I used to do.

I sorted out a long time ago that the world was going way too fast for me. I slowed down and refused to keep the pace of those around me. I collided with people from time to time, and finally had to let go of considering long term relating with any man.  People were, quite simply, in too much of a hurry for everything, and not taking time to think of consequences. That shows now in the world economy. I watched this country begin to sell itself back in the 80’s. As others were switching to living on credit, I paid off all that I owed and switched to cash. I’ve walked away from all I owned more than once since that time, and was free to do so because I didn’t owe anyone anything.  When a life situation looked impossible, I admitted it was, and walked away.  That worked just fine. I am happier than anyone I know. I don’t weigh things in terms of success and failure any longer. I enjoy each day for what it is. Sometimes I have “OH! Wow!” experiences and sometimes I have “Oops!” experiences. When something doesn’t offer the desired result, I say to myself, “Well, that certainly didn’t work! ” and I let go of it.  I use the word miracle often, because my life is miraculous. I should not have survived my past. I should not be able to do all the things I do. I laugh at the word should.

I have a clear conscience. I don’t have to remember whatever lie I told someone, because I speak honestly. That simplifies my life. I sleep well at night. I don’t spend a lot of time worrying because I don’t plot against anyone. That being the case, I have learned that anyone who tries to do me in, winds up caught in his/her own trap. The truth truly does win out, and I like being a winner, so I stick with it. When I am falsely accused I realize the one making the accusation is telling me who he/she is. I listen well. I do not like finding out negative things about others, but am grateful for the warnings given.